They say a broken clock is right twice a day, but it’s never 88:88.

How do you balance an eBook on your head?

Pamela Voorhees was a true trailblazer. We must never forget her sacrifice and service. Nowadays masked slasher killing is such a boys club.

I once wrote a jingle about urine. It was my number one song.

Using a stud finder. “Here I am!” Every single time. One day someone will laugh and it will have all been worth it.

Sometimes when I’m in a hurry I brush my teeth in the shower, but it always takes like shampoo. My hair though has never been whiter or more plaque free.

The most diagnosed condition in Florida from both Spring Breakers and the elderly is of course Senioritis.

Dogs only live 1/7 of a life and cats get 9 lives, so why don’t cats live 63 times longer than dogs?

There’s no coffee bar called Bean Me Up, Biscotti.

Starting tomorrow, I’m probably going to try being a little more present in the moment.